Speyside Way - Day 2 of 6 - part 2

Continued from Speyside Way - Day 2 of 6 - part 1

So at least I’m having fun blogging again. And maybe I’m practicing a little what imaginary jesus is trying to teach me by loving blogging even when I am keenly aware of how flawed it is, how fallible I am as a writer. It’s a crazy idea he has that I resist believing him, letting him become a vivid presence in my imagination, because I am afraid to feel his love. Because I never got over feeling loved - having faith in that possibility - and having it be shattered. But Jesus is trying to tell me that’s just part of the way things are. We don’t have an option of a perfect universe with perfect love. 

Last night after a long day I took myself out for Indian food which I expected to really enjoy and was very disappointed. It was way too hot and I couldn’t enjoy it. I blamed myself for not ordering carefully enough. But tonight I decided to go out for Indian food again - sort of like get right back on the horse after you fall off - don’t give your fears time to take you over. This time I deliberately ordered a medium-mild dish and it is delicious. (I am eating as I write this. And it is really good.) So I feel proud of myself. (For getting back on the horse and having a glorious ride). 

It was a funny day. It started out cold and gray and my hands got pretty cold as I walked through it. then the sun started to peek in and out just as I sat near a window eating a very nice lunch. Since I’d had so little sleep and no breakfast I figured I should have a hot lunch. I thought I would just have cheese and oatcakes for dinner but when I looked at the next few days I think I will need that cheese and those oatcakes I have for midday meals (doesn’t look like I will have options along the Way). Besides I am doing a lot of walking and I want to be sure I am taking good care of my body. I am struck how different it feels to walk for three weeks than the one week of walks I’ve been doing quarterly for years. I really really like what happens the slow changes in my body and awareness as I walk for a long time. Not just day after day, but week after week.  I hope I will get to do it again but if I don’t I am so glad I did it this time. But I was going to tell you about lunch today - carrot and cilantro soup (with gluten free bread!), falafel salad, and a pot of green tea that felt so so good after a cold morning. I took the photo below to send to Chrissy and just as I addressed it to her the sun came out. 

The day was funny - in addition to the sun being in and out, there were very strong gusts of wind. At one point I got too hot in the sun and started to take my jacket off. I got one sleeve off and then the wind whipped up and the sun slipped behind a cloud - and I didn’t quite want to take the other sleeve off. So I walked like that quite awhile - one sleeve off, one on - my tribute to changeable Scottish  weather. 

The weather forecast is seriously a little bit scary. 

My last walk will be Wednesday. I can put on layers but I seriously did not bring the kind of hat and mitten I would wear at home in the 20s. I was expecting the high 30s to be as low as it would go. Could I buy a hat and mittens here? Tuesday would be my first opportunity (the only time I will be in s place big enough possibly for that kind of shop. I could possibly have done it yesterday in Aviemore if I had thought about it.Why is it important to me to face these challenges? Why not just fold like in Bridge (is it bridge?) when you get dealt a really lousy hand. No just googled it. It’s in poker. (Poker brings me back to the whisky trail. The game we used to play in my stepfamily, and it almost felt to me like a real family having fun together, even with all Jack’s drinking and belittling. )

Maybe not folding - maybe playing the weather cards I am dealt - is a wee bit of practicing what Jesus is talking about: loving an imperfect world. Being able to embrace the joy and beauty of the walk, the peace, the tedium - and the hardship and pain also - all as part of my walk through a beautiful place in a beautiful world. 

You deserve another photo or two. Nothing breathtaking today. But I liked this sign. 

I wanted to get a good shot of the ewe with two little lambs I saw shortly after, but sheep are very shy. 

I also liked walking under this railroad bridge. I liked the way the squareness of it framed the view of the mountains in the distance. Sort of the way I liked how that eye made out of woven branches framed the distant view from a high point in my hike a few days ago. Boy that seems a long time ago. I walked under the bridge in the photon- and then turned around and walked back so I could take the picture. 

Well that will do. Definitely not my favorite blog but it will do. And it is such a pleasure to share it with you and trust that you will find something to like (or even love) no matter how fallible and imperfect this creator and her creation. 

Tomorrow we walk 13 miles to Bsllindalich in, alas, cold and rain. Let’s cross our fingers. And toes. And legs. And arms. And eyes. And nose - wait we can’t cross our noses, can we? 

Bye for now then!